The Messy Things

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We as moms need to understand how to coach them well.

By Wendy Blissett, Perimeter School mom of three boys

Sometimes the thought of “playing” with my boys seems like a thing of the past. The toddler days of racing trucks on the floor, making mud soup, putting together puzzles, and reading the same books over and over again are gone for us. While those are memories I will cherish, I’m not sure how much of them my boys will remember when they are older. The memory of being present with them, getting down on the floor, and getting dirty seems to be just that… a memory. 

Being older now, my boys are into much bigger things – school activities, church, sports, friends, and my least favorite... video games. When they do these things, most often I with them – cheering them on, supervising, or being available when needed. I am not on their level, getting dirty, playing along, or engaging their hearts. 


Teaching our Boys

Proverbs 22:6 tells us to “train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is older he will not depart from it.”  That training can come through us getting messy in the woods, shooting some hoops, dancing to silly songs in the kitchen, building a fort, and yes, even playing a video game or two. It is in these moments that we moms can reach the hearts of our boys. We can show them we cherish and love them by spending valuable time with them, doing what they are doing – laughing with them, being silly, and just enjoying what their hearts enjoy.


Learning About Our Boys

I believe this is also a time where we as moms can learn more about our boys – how they reason their next move, strategize a game plan, deal with the unknown, and face a challenge. These are all life skills they will need when they leave our homes. We as moms need to understand how to coach them well in these situations. Being present with them in their daily fun affords us that opportunity.

The Bible tells us that Jesus spent time with his disciples. He learned about them by walking alongside them. We can do the same, even as our boys grow older and their activities and interest change… even as life seems to get busier, and there are days when we can’t get it all done… even when we simply feel like their chauffeurs, their waitresses, and their maids. We have the opportunity to stop and simply be in the moment with them. Engaged.

Just as the toddler years flew right by, so will these years when they turn from boys into the men God intends them to be. Let us be reminded to take a few minutes of each day to get messy. Let’s give our boys the opportunity to make memories we can all laugh about when they are older.

The Mother Son Adventure coming up April 21st is a great way to engage with our boys.  A time to laugh, climb, swing – to connect their hearts to ours and simply be in the moment.